November 05, 2021
I met my wife Marsha, online, in January 2013 and I wrote three pieces to her, which I add to this November, 2021 post. We married (legally) in 2014 and since then, my life has been a complete flurry of my wife's cancer (thankfully in total remission!), my oldest sister's death (who I miss each day), the ins and outs of living with the one (Marsha) who I love, new pets, and a general state of too busy to express my thoughts here, as I once did faithfully. Not to mention....Covid!
With this post, I wish to let the world know that Marsha is my Rock and my Joy. She is my life's TRUE Beshert. My life's TRUE Love. I thank God, and her, each day for our love, and for our ability to be married. We share Wedded Bliss and Daily Fun and Joy.
I previously did not show you how BEAUTIFUL she is, so I'm showing you now. And add 2 photos from our wedding. We were wed at Beth Chayim Chadashim by our Lesbian Rabbi,
JUNE 06, 2013
MARCH 28, 2013
APRIL 19, 2013
I have taken pieces from this blog, A Woman's Voice For Love and Reason, polished them, added to them, and published a book: Overcoming Deepest Grief, A Woman's Journey.
The book is available on Amazon:
My hope and prayer is that you will buy a copy, read it, and please give me feedback.
Please also give the world feedback by writing an Amazon review.
Mary Aviyah Farkas
April 23, 2021
Will things truly change? Will police become less trigger happy? Will Black Lives Stop Being Killed?
Nope. The very same day that Evil was convicted, another young Black Life was murdered by police:
And sadly, there will be more. Police are not trained to de-escalate situations. Sadly. And they are trained to intimidate and use unnecessary force. Sadly.
Why do they receive Army surplus weapons, tanks, killing machines? The American public is NOT the enemy.
AND the repugs continue to believe that the rapist won the election. And they continue to refuse the vaccine.
I can see now why the world entered into the "Dark Ages" in the 200 - 1400 CE time. It's easy to let stupidity take over.
December 14, 2020
The Electoral College is voting today, December 14, 2020 and the Evil which still inhabits the People's House has still not quelled the anger of his supporters.....all 70 something million of them; nearly half of all U.S. voters.
Someone will surely die, and this past weekend, several have been gravely maimed.
Why is the new media not calling out this man for who he is? He is mentally deranged and he supports a lie....that the election was "stolen" from him.
The sooner this lie is put to rest, the better. We do NOT need more people in large groups on the streets, yelling, threatening, and goading each other.
This is a time of great pain for many. Let us honor their losses, of friends, family, loved ones as well as their loss of career and jobs, monetary security, and loss of integrity. This is a time to mourn. This is a time to acknowledge Covid's grip on our world, to do what is right: social distance, and wear masks. And by all means, when the vaccine is available to you, by all means, take it.
September 29, 2015
Lately, I’ve been reading and admiring the young Black voice and profound insights of Ta-Nehisi Coates and the Black Lives Matter Movement. Just yesterday it was announced that he won a MacArthur Genius Award ($500,000 given over 5 years).
Ta-Nehisi writes about the embodiment of racism. How racism was and is FELT very primally in one's body, in his body. Ta-Nehisi’s book: Between the World and Me, written as a letter to his 15 year old son, talks about his abject fear growing up as a Black young man in Baltimore. A fear which he felt viscerally, deep in his body.
“Racism dislodges brains, blocks airways, extracts organs, cracks bones, breaks teeth. You must NEVER look away from this.” And: “Here is what I would like for you to know: In America, it is traditional to destroy the black body – it is heritage.”
Mr. Coates also rightly notes that whites “presume” their “whiteness”. How easily white society forgets that we are ALL AFRICAN. We ALL originated from one Black people.
We are ALL multi-colored skin. “Whiteness” is a myth, as is the concept of “race.” But it has, and repeatedly continues to use the “just-ice” system to destroy lives with skin which happens to be darker. Racism IS America’s heritage.
The Black Lives Movement’s representatives Daunasia Yancy and Julius Jones tussled with Hillary Clinton this summer, asking her to account for her role in the mass incarceration of young Black men. She and Bill advocated harsh penalties for non-violent crimes. Hillary pushed back, asking the Black Lives Matter spokespeople what specific legislative changes are they asking for.
Of course, I could not read Ta-Nehisi’s work, nor could I hear interviews with the Black Lives Matter representatives without thinking: “Yes. Of course. Everything that they are saying is exactly how it feels to inhabit a woman’s body.” And Black women experience BOTH racism and sexism. Thank you to my dear friend Demita Frazier, and to Barbara and Beverly Smith and the other pioneering Black women of the Combahee River Collective. You can google their Collective’s manifesto which clearly identified the multi-layered forces of oppression they experience as Black women: race, class, gender, and sexual orientation. Today, the term for this multi-layered consciousness of oppression is: “intersections” which I don’t think truly conveys the intensity, sometimes horror, of what it means to live in a Black and “non-white” female body.
Society would not consider me Black, despite my being of African origin (as we ALL are), but I am female and have experienced firsthand how Sexism primally, viscerally is felt in my body. How often did I experience abject fear, cold visceral fear while walking home as a young girl, young woman on the streets of New York City. My near rape in the hallway of our Manhattan apartment building when I was 8 years old created a firm knowledge that I was not safe. After this near rape, I carried a small pocket knife for “protection”. Of course it wouldn’t have protected me from another assault, but my body felt safer. The men sitting opposite me in the subway jerking off (yes, in public). The cat calls and lewd remarks made while minding my own business just walking on the street. The calculations I made when entering my apartment building: if I enter via the basement and quickly run up the stairs to wait for the elevator on the first floor, I’ll be able to hear if someone is following me. Always afraid, always looking over my shoulder, my young being, ready to avert the next attacker.
Yes, fear, bone crushing fear inhabits women’s bodies and minds, just as it does the bodies and minds of Black and multi-colored people. This is America’s heritage. Sadly, the WORLD’s heritage. My 67 year old mind and body are tired of BOTH the racist and sexist stereotypes, the violence against Blacks, against women, the sexist and racist HERITAGE which destroys us. Enough already.
May 22, 2015
The world is raging with war, killings, destroyed lives....still. We've barely left the most horrible century for human murder, the twentieth, and there is no sign that it will let up.
It is end of May 2015 and there are more refugees and displaced persons now than at the end of World War II.
Boat loads of people escaping turmoil, failed states, chaos, murder, hunger, running to find a better life. As Thomas Friedman of the N.Y. Times put it, they're escaping dis-order, seeking order. Most likely it will only get worse, as climate change and income inequality become more prevalent. In California and large swaths of the western U.S., drought is taking its toll on the lives of the poorest. Large industrial orchards suck groundwater deeply leaving poorer more shallow wells to run dry. Towns in central California have had no running water for months now.
But I continue to Trust. Continue to Accept that the arc of human destiny can only improve. Continue to Understand that this movement for the better is a slow, almost imperceptible process. I am hopeful...still.
So I share a long quote from Amos Oz, the Israeli author, taken from an interview in the Jewish Journal (http://www.jewishjournal.com/) May 15 - 21, 2015. Oz is interviewed by Rob Eshman, Editor-in-Chief for the Jewish Journal and they're discussing the prospect of peace in the middle east and the necessity for wearing the uniform of armies:
Oz states: "Look, you have to live in this complicated world. You have to be clearing the sewage from time to time, clean a blockage in the sewage. And you do that, and you do that as well as you can do. But there is not much pride in coming out of the sewage, stinking all over - you take a quick shower, you don't walk in the street claiming, "I just cleaned the sewage." No, I don't feel any pride in wearing uniforms. I find necessity. I don't find...any beauty in bars on the windows and locks on the doors. But they are a necessity."
I don't have a solution for this tangled, complicated, messy dis-ordered world we live in.
I don't know how to stop ISIS and other fanatics from killing, destroying, leaving terror and horror.
But I wanted to share Amos Oz' words because they echo how I feel.
May there be Peace, Shalom in this Dear World .......soon.
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