December 24, 2014

Hanukkah 2014



Seventh night of flaming light in our home.

Watching the women dance in the flame,
playing their instruments, background to the light.
Gratitude, always Gratitude.

Marsha and I have been through a mighty test.
She diagnosed with cancer, survived the brute
chemo radiation hell.
"If one survives this burning, cell killing poison
they must be meant to live,"
I commented to one of her doctors.
He just smiled.

Me losing my oldest and last sister.
We used to be three.
Issue of same mother and father.
Womb blood, blood of childhood fights, blood
of Mine.

There at her death.  Holding squeezing her hand
to let her know my presence.
She did.
She squeezed back even as she gasped for air
in her last days.
Every last bit of her strength was given up to breathe.
Every last bit of her strength squeezed out of her
each hour each minute
she fought
for air.
She fought for hours
till finally
the rattle
the tell tale sounds of the end.
I held onto her hand to the end.
Until it was over.

I've been Blessed with
Being Present at the death of
both of my sisters.
Blessed with holding them
long after their last
breath.

What a year we've had.
I am grateful that we can give light to Women Playing
silent tunes
with these miracle flames.


May 02, 2014

Prayer Written for my B'Nai Mitzvah Class

Marsha & I are taking a B'Nai Mitzvah class, with our Bat Mitzvahs scheduled to take place Saturday, July 26th (2014).
Our Temple, Beth Chayim Chadashim (http://www.bcc-la.org) happens to be the very first, yes folks, the world's FIRST gay and lesbian (and bi and transgender) Temple in the world.
Rabbi Heather Miller who is leading our class has asked us to create a prayer.  Easy for me because I pray to G-d daily, several times a day.  
If you've read some or all of this blog, you'll find several prayers which I've written over the years. Here is a new one:

My Dearest G-d
Barauch Ha'Shem
My Dearest G-d
Yod Hai Vov Hai
Adonai
Shekhinah
El Shadai
Ha Shem
Help me to love You with all my heart and soul.
Help me to realize that loving You is the MOST important thing in my life.
Thank You for my life, for my wife - the woman who completes me -
for my health, home, family, and friends.
Thank You for the Creation of this Dear World.
Thank You for making me a Jew, for creating me in Your image, and for sustaining me in all that I do.
Amen




April 18, 2014

Flying to the End of the Earth One Day

I am still moving in with Marsha.
Post wedding, I have time to go through old files and...
lo and behold, came across a ditty from years and years ago.
A quarter page of Frances Stern Nutrition Center letterhead cut neatly to make scrap paper.
(more about Frances Stern
Nutrition Center in a future post)
On the back of the scrap letterhead, I'd written the following:

Flying to the end of the earth one day
      I beheld Golden Irises...
Diving to the floor of the deepest sea
      somersault seahorses dance with me...
Listening to the stars as they fade away
      I can hear angels laughing.


I'm sure that I did NOT write this.....but for the life of me, I can't recall where these lines came from.

Does anyone know?
I think it's beautiful.

April 12, 2014



     Our Wedding Cake

Needless to say, I have been quite occupied in the past year!
I met Marsha Epstein on J-Date (Jewish Dating) back in January, 2013.  We met face to face on February 22, 2013 and my life hasn't been the same.
We wed just one month ago on March 16, 2014.
I can honestly say, that I have never been happier in my entire life.

Now that the wedding planning is over, I will have time to write and continue to share my heart and thoughts with whomever happens upon this blog.